Dear Cady,

Dear Cady,

I received the news yesterday that you were gone to be with Jesus.

There were no words. Just tears.

I read through my journals last night to read of the times we had together. God gave YOU to me in your DTS. How did I get entrusted to run with you?

Before I knew you, I asked God what this season of lecture phase on your DTS was about. He said it was about resurrection. How the valley of dry bones would come to life. I wrote that on a card for you to welcome you to A-102.

And you did come to life.

The first ministry night of your DTS, on April 10th, 2023, you rededicated your life back to God. I remember you telling me the next morning as you sat on your bed as I was getting ready.

He led me to call our room in A building “Safe Haven.” God told me to show you home. I never told you that. I remember you later saying our room feels like home. That you haven’t been around such a healthy community before and with people who loved you so much. Those words carry so much weight now knowing this was our last season this side of heaven.

God had me waking up in the middle of the night to have my quiet time your whole DTS. I will always remember when you wanted to have your quiet time with me right next to me in a folded chair with light coming from the bathroom as our room was still asleep. You would show me a Bible verse that stuck out or ask for prayer.

The whole 150 days of Him waking me up was about taking care of the sheep entrusted to my care. Sure I had other people I was meeting with, but He highlighted YOU. You were a main focus for me. I told you how He said I was to walk alongside you in this season. What a gift.

I remember when you told me you sleep better at night knowing that I was awake next to the door having my quiet time. It was wild you said that because He had just shown me that a shepherd stays awake at night to watch the sheep against any predators.

He spoke to me about a true shepherd really caring for the sheep.

I truly loved you Cady. I remember you telling me how much you loved me. You loved our talks at night when you sat in your bunk bed and me in my mine. I remember one day especially when I got home after being gone all day and you told me over and over how much you missed me and how you were so glad to see me. It’s those moments that I’m so thankful I soaked up.

I remember one night you asking me “Would you be sad if I left?”

YES Cady, I’d be sad if you left.

Home is not home without the people that make it home. I remember you saying “I’m not used to love.”

I loved our room dinner when you got us chicken curry. Or the time you went to Costco and got me a TON of fruit and coconut waters. You were so generous. I’ll never forget how happy you were the day we ate at Thai Rin. You said you hoped I would always be in your life.

I loved our one on ones when I told you how proud I was of you, how far you had come. Jesus led me to speak LIFE into you. I told you that and you loved how I noticed the steps. We also talked about the hard things and He wanted me to emphasize the growth.

You grew so much in your DTS.

I cried so hard saying goodbye to you towards the end of lecture phase as I helped you to the flags where your dad picked you up. Your dad loved you to pieces. You knew that. As I processed your leaving the next morning, God spoke to me that I loved you until the end. I thought He meant the end of my time you were entrusted to my care. Now I see more clearly what He meant.

You encouraged me we would still have one on ones. And we did. Our last one was at Starbucks. The same as all the rest, but not…because I had no idea it was our last. The same….in that I encouraged you in how far you have come and saw the gold in you.

Jesus allows me to see people in a small way of how He sees them. Maybe that is why this year’s theme for me is “Eyes like Fire.” My prayer is to see rightly. And He truly allowed me to see a glimpse of how He sees you.

I remember the night we had story time. I shared with you about Yano. This feels so similar now losing you. God gave me Yano in her last season of life. I loved her like crazy. I had no idea God designed it that way to love her wildly in her exit. I remember her mom telling me that I showed her how to love Yano better. It was God’s love in me.

While I was with Yano in Israel in 2021, I had this encounter with God’s love. It changed me. The depth of love I felt for Yano was unreal.

And then He gave me you in 2023. The last written thing I have from you is “I love you so much TT so thankful for you ❤️ till we meet again!”

Yes til we meet again.

We will Cady. On April 10th, 2023….you rededicated your life back to Jesus. He’s the best Shepherd. I saw your love for Jesus first hand. I saw the deep desire for Him and His ways. I’ll never forget our times with tears, prayers and talks. You loved Him and now you are with Him because of His blood poured out for you. It’s amazing grace. And I can’t wait to see you when I get there.

Love you Cady.